Love YOU first...confessions of a (tired) daydreamer

Page 366 of 366...who else is ready to close this book?  2020 - what a year it's been.  I am not going to write about how great or awful it was because this past year has affected us all in many different ways. It's brought all of us different things and we've all gone through so much, in our own ways. I speak the truth when I say that 2020 was definitely not a "one size fits all" and more than a few of us won't miss it.  For me, I am ready for this story to end. I am ready to start the new year. I am ready for all that is to come. I won't claim this as "my year", but I will embrace each new journey, each new idea, and each new memory to come.  Goodbye 2020.  Hello 2021.  xoxo, T

Friends, have you ever done something spur of the moment and after you did it, you felt excited, invigorated and maybe a little crazy?  Have you ever had that rush of emotions that just make you want to scream from the rooftops everything that you've been bottling up inside? The jump for joy kind of excitement?  Have you ever chased a dream that you thought was out of reach and literally only happens to people in movies. You know, that "Perfect love story" or "Big promotion with corner office?"  Have you ever felt cheated out of a situation or scenario that left you wanting to prove you're bigger, better and more badass than before?  Well, today I did something big.  I took a leap of faith and followed my heart. I made up my mind and told myself that I was worth it! My happiness and my dreams matter. My wants, my wishes and my desires for more in my life is worth it. I deserve greatness, appreciation, and all the rewards for putting myself on  the back burne

Friends, I wish you a very Merry Christmas! I hope that today brings joy, happiness and love to you and your family.  Be well. Stay safe.  xoxo, T

My dear friend, I know you're hurting. I know you are searching for that one thing to keep you going. I know that you are one step away from losing all control. I know that your heart is weary and you feel isolated and unseen. I know that you're looking for someone to catch your fall. I know that you're ready to walk away from everything.  And I don't blame you. Not for one second.  I know that all the things you wished and hoped for didn't turn out like you thought. I know that you feel like you're everyones 'safe' plan. I know that you are alone and afraid. I know that you want things to be different. I know that you dream of more. I know that you pray for the day you can wake up from this bad nightmare. I know that you cry, alone, in the dark. I know it all feels like too much and that you think it will never get better.   But it will get better. I promise.  I don't know when and I don't know how. I don't even know what "it" look

"She has the perfect life." I am quite positive that I have thought these words out loud. Wished them over and over with hopes of future existence. Had that "I wanna be like her when I grow up" daydream. And yes, I know how ridiculous that sounds.  But it's true.  I mean, she really is perfect. She has the perfect hair. The perfect smile. The perfect laugh. She is a free spirit and dances to the beat of her own drum. She is carefree and adventurous. She lives life on the edge. She pushes buttons and talks back...and always stands up for what is right. She is a fashionista to the max. She even looks adorable in sweats with messy buns! She is a strong and independent and I am just in awe of her everyday.  She is my daughter.  Some would say that I am giving her a complex by calling her perfect. I would say that I agree, if that was something I said to her face. But I don't. She doesn't hear that she is 'perfect' from me. And if you ask her what per

Dear Tired Mama,      (yes, I'm talking to you)  The one who wakes up first to prepare for the day. The one who stays up after the kids go to bed, to enjoy just 20 minutes of alone time. The one who chases tots all day while trying to clean, cook, and organize the family home. The one who works outside the home and still has dinner on the table by 6pm.  The one who has a spouse over seas and holds down the fort, solo, back at home. The one who feels like a taxi, taking the kids to and from all the places. The one who is a single mama, managing it all on her own. The one who stresses about where the next meal will come from, or how to keep the power on.  The one who goes without, so her kids can have more. The one who hides in the closet and cries because she thinks no one can hear her. The one who gives selflessly because she has more than enough. The one whose friends are 2000 miles away with no family close by. The one who is broken inside and is searching for a way to make the p

Ever since I was a little girl, maybe 5 years old, I always knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I knew that I wanted to make people smile on the happiest day of their life. I knew that I wanted everything to be perfect...the cake, the dress, the food, the decor...down to every last little detail. I wanted to be the hero that made their dreams come true.  I wanted to be a Wedding Planner.  I married off my barbies, my babies, my Fisher Price little people. I married off the bath toys, the army men and the barrel of monkeys. I married off anything I could. And as I grew up, my dream of one day being a wedding planner never changed.  While in high school, I started looking at colleges and had my heart set on two amazing schools. I wanted to attend the University of Colorado at Boulder. It was a school with high accolades in event planning. I also wanted to attend the University of California at Los Angeles. I mean, this was THE prime location for celebrity weddings and events being s

Happy December, friends!  I've been away for several days, and for that, I am sorry. I wasn't in a good head space to write and rather than have my hot mess of thoughts blurted out here, I saved you all the headache of trying to read it. However, I am feeling so much better today and I have so many things on my heart to share!  The last few days have been a blur and while feeling both stressed and overwhelmed, yesterday my heart smiled because I realized what day it was...December 1st!!  December 1st is one of the happiest days of the year for me; it's the day my kids and I put up our beautiful Christmas tree! Friends, Christmastime is my most favorite time of the year! I love the lights, giving presents, baking cookies and making gingerbread houses. I love putting up the lights on the house, decorating the tree, watching all the Christmas movies and drinking hot cocoa. I love the twinkle in my kids' eyes on Christmas morning, our yearly visit to Zoo lights and driving