Once upon a dream

Ever since I was a little girl, maybe 5 years old, I always knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I knew that I wanted to make people smile on the happiest day of their life. I knew that I wanted everything to be perfect...the cake, the dress, the food, the decor...down to every last little detail. I wanted to be the hero that made their dreams come true. 

I wanted to be a Wedding Planner. 

I married off my barbies, my babies, my Fisher Price little people. I married off the bath toys, the army men and the barrel of monkeys. I married off anything I could. And as I grew up, my dream of one day being a wedding planner never changed. 

While in high school, I started looking at colleges and had my heart set on two amazing schools. I wanted to attend the University of Colorado at Boulder. It was a school with high accolades in event planning. I also wanted to attend the University of California at Los Angeles. I mean, this was THE prime location for celebrity weddings and events being so close to Hollywood! 

However, I also knew that financially, both of these schools were a far fetched dream. I would never be able to afford either. We were broke. I secretly hoped that somehow, someway, my parents would be able to afford an instate school. Maybe I would be a 3rd generation University of Oregon Duck!? It was on my short list of realistic dream schools. 

Sadly, none of my dreams came true. 

Life had a different plan. One that led me down the darkest time of my life. I had to grow up real quick. I learned not to trust anyone, who my real friends were, and how to raise a tiny human...by myself. Yep, I became a single teen mom and it was absolutely terrifying. Yet, somehow, someway, I was lucky enough to graduate high school...but the thoughts of attending college had vanished. In a single moment of pure evil, I was stripped of everything that meant so much to me...and it wasn't fair. 

If you've ever heard the phrase "You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have," that was my life. That was what I had become. 3 weeks shy of my 18th birthday, a beautiful baby boy entered my world. From that moment on, nothing else mattered. My only goal was to do everything possible for him and in doing that, I had to let go of everything I wanted. 

I cried everyday. I felt cheated and angry. I felt scared and alone. I felt sad and disappointed. I felt like giving up. 

It wasn't until a strong woman, who I barely even knew, reached out and spoke life back into me. She spoke of her own dark past and how she clawed her way back to standing. Listening to her, I started to have hope again. She shared with me that community college was the stepping stone into her career. So I started researching and found one, not far from home, with a program that aligned with my childhood dream. 

I applied. On a wish and a prayer, I also applied for every scholarship I could find. I had no idea how I was going to be a mom, go to school, afford gas or daycare, but there was a spark that ignited in me. Something in my gut felt like it was ok to dream again. 

And I did it. I did it all. 

I went to school, I paid the daycare, I worked two jobs, I bought the gas and I raised my boy. In two years time, I graduated. I earned that degree and I walked across that stage. And in that moment, I knew that it was ok to dream again. 

And it was ok to dream big!

Friends, have you lost sight of your dreams? Have you given up on those dreams you had when you were a kid? Have you accomplished the things in life that you said you always wanted? I'm giving you permission to go back to that childhood fantasy. Go dig up that dream of what you lost sight of. Go find your thing that makes you the happiest. I promise that you can do it. I promise that it'll work out. I promise that you have what it takes and I will be right here to cheer you on! Go live out your dreams. YOU are worth it!

xoxo,
T