Love YOU first...confessions of a (tired) daydreamer

Eyes closed. Breathe in. Exhale. Eyes open.  I'm about to tell you something that most people don't know about me. I'm about to share a secret that most people wouldn't believe. I'm about to speak my truth and share it with the world.  I write these words here about being brave, worthy and positive. I tell you to fight for your dreams and go after what you want. I share heart felt stories and encourage you to believe in yourself. I tell you that happiness is the key to life.  Friends, all of this is true and I want all of this for you.  But what if I told you that I struggle with all of those things for myself? What if I said that self confidence and self acceptance are my weakness. What if I said that I drown in self doubt. What if I said I don't feel worthy of happiness or love. What if I told you that the things I want in life aren't achievable because they don't belong to me. That all the material things I have in life belong to someone else's dr...

Dear Brave Girl,  Somewhere along the way, you lost your shine. You let the weight of the world hold you down. You forgot who you were and what your purpose on this earth was. You listened to the voices that told you that you weren't good enough, not skinny enough, not brave enough, not worthy enough. You succumbed to the life of settling...a life of ordinary. You stopped believing in yourself. You battled the demons in your head and you let them win. You lost your smile, your passion, your light. You became broken.  But you're still standing.  And I am here to remind you of who YOU are.  You are a warrior. You are a survivor. You have overcome everything that was supposed to break you down because you kept getting back up. You faced it all head on. You are strong. You are brave. You are worthy of so much more than you give yourself credit for. You have power in your story. You never quit. You step up and take on the burdens of others, without hesitation. You keep gi...

When you become a parent, no one tells you about all the hard parts. I'm not talking about the sleepless nights, the crying for hours, or the fact that losing the baby weight can sometimes take years. I'm not talking about the teething, the "terrible twos" or even the grocery store tantrums. I'm not talking about the hours of screaming in long car rides, the battles over food or the endless outgrowing of clothes. I'm not talking about the sassy attitudes or the frustrations over doing school work.  Nope, none of that is relevant here.  I am talking about the other hard parts. The big feelings, the borrowed time, and the fact that your heart is forever living outside of your body.  I'm talking about the tears of disappointment when they fail their first test or lose their first game. The heartbreak of a first love. I'm talking about watching them ride off to school on the bus for the first time, or dropping them off and waving goodbye as they walk away....

Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I never met you. If all the pieces and roads that led me to that very place, that moment, hadn't happened. I think back to the few weeks prior when my life was headed a different direction. I wonder what life would be like now, had that detour happened.  Sometimes I wonder where we would be had you not left. Would we have made it, then? Would our lives look like our plans and dreams that we thought? I wonder where our journey would have taken us, what memories we would have made and what adventures we would have experienced. I wonder where we'd be at today.  Sometimes I wonder if you miss us. The dynamic trio. I wonder if you miss the fun we had and the memories we made. I wonder if you thought about him growing up and wishing you could be there too. I think he would have loved you. I wish he could have known you. I wish you could know him now like you did back then. I sure miss you and I wonder if you miss me too.  Sometimes ...

Friends, do you have a tribe? Do you have people there to catch your fall, to listen to your ramblings, to love you fiercely through life? If not a tribe, do you have a person? That one support person that is there for every high and every low? Someone who knows you better than you know yourself? Someone who never leaves? If the answer is no, then let me be your person.  I will walk with you in the trenches and help you claw your way out of the darkness. I will be your voice when you feel so broken that you can't speak. I will be your compass when you feel lost and alone in the world. I will be the wall you can lean on when you're tired and you can't stand. I will sit with you in silence and I will celebrate every victory. I will hold your hand while you cry and I will hug all your broken pieces back together. Let me be your person and I will help you build your tribe.  Everyone needs a tribe and I am so grateful for mine.  A simple text. A short video message. A quick FB...

A few years ago, I had the honor and privilege to listen to two very powerful motivational speakers. This husband and wife duo spoke many times throughout the years that I was involved with a company with them, and each time it was exactly what I needed. I never walked away with dry eyes. I always sat so intently, listening, and frantically writing pages of leadership nuggets. They were so inspirational and I made every effort, every time, to be in their presence.  During one of those sessions, was a message that pierced me right in the gut. It was one of those 'slap me moments'...pinch me and make sure this is real life. It was so profound and struck all the nerves in me. I was frozen, stunned, in shock at the words she spoke. It's something that I have kept with me since that day and every so often, I have to remind myself of that message.  "What you tolerate, you give permission to exist." - J.D. We are in charge and we have the ability to CHOOSE what we want i...

Taking risks is always scary. I am not one who typically dives head first into the unknown. I'm a planner. I am a thinker. I thrive on the details and mark off the to-do lists. So when life throws curveballs, my little world becomes chaotic.  However, sometimes taking risks can be exciting. The kind that you see coming. The kind that you have been wishing and hoping for. The ones that you have a good enough plan to say "yes" to even though you can't see the whole staircase. Those are the ones that have the possibility of changing your life forever.  On March 6th, I took the biggest risk. I packed up my life and headed east. I left behind everything I've ever known...my home, my friends, and my family. I left the state that I was born and raised in, the one I never thought that I would leave, for a new adventure...a risk, a chance, a hope and dream of seeking better. Better for myself, better for my kids, better for what life had in store for my family. The only pl...