I told myself when I started this little blog that I would write when I felt like it and only when I felt like it. When I felt like my words were there...when I felt like what I had to say was worthy of being re-read or repeated. I've taken quite a bit of time off of here because that's what I needed. Sometimes I think it would have helped by writing, but I wouldn't want to go back and re-read those thoughts - depressing, angry, betrayed, sad, self-sabotaging thoughts. All things not worth repeating. But I am ready now. Ready to write the things out that are on my heart. Ready to put myself out there and share myself with the world again. I am fully in control of what I put out into the universe and I have learned to release the control of how others interpret my words. So if you're here, welcome. And if you're struggling with something hard or trying to calm all the racing thoughts in your head, let me share what a sweet friend told me during some of my roughest...
When you become a parent, no one tells you about all the hard parts. I'm not talking about the sleepless nights, the crying for hours, or the fact that losing the baby weight can sometimes take years. I'm not talking about the teething, the "terrible twos" or even the grocery store tantrums. I'm not talking about the hours of screaming in long car rides, the battles over food or the endless outgrowing of clothes. I'm not talking about the sassy attitudes or the frustrations over doing school work. Nope, none of that is relevant here. I am talking about the other hard parts. The big feelings, the borrowed time, and the fact that your heart is forever living outside of your body. I'm talking about the tears of disappointment when they fail their first test or lose their first game. The heartbreak of a first love. I'm talking about watching them ride off to school on the bus for the first time, or dropping them off and waving goodbye as they walk away....
Friends, do you have a tribe? Do you have people there to catch your fall, to listen to your ramblings, to love you fiercely through life? If not a tribe, do you have a person? That one support person that is there for every high and every low? Someone who knows you better than you know yourself? Someone who never leaves? If the answer is no, then let me be your person. I will walk with you in the trenches and help you claw your way out of the darkness. I will be your voice when you feel so broken that you can't speak. I will be your compass when you feel lost and alone in the world. I will be the wall you can lean on when you're tired and you can't stand. I will sit with you in silence and I will celebrate every victory. I will hold your hand while you cry and I will hug all your broken pieces back together. Let me be your person and I will help you build your tribe. Everyone needs a tribe and I am so grateful for mine. A simple text. A short video message. A quick FB...
It's late, but I hope your Christmas was amazing!
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